Time machine..

I've been down lately. nah.. Actually, I was feeling okay. I felt everything I have now is perfect. A good job, a lot of friends, a long-time lover, an understanding family.. Whatelse should I ask for. I never realized that there's still something in me that would ruin my fairy tale. I then realized that, like Bella in Twilight, I can easily remove all the not-so good memories in my head.
There's this one time.. I thought everything is okay. I was awakened by the wrong things I did before. It flashed back and it's really scary. I totally forgot those but yeah ofcourse,people didn't. People really do judge others based on how they heard THE story. And I effin hate it! They treat me good. But behind my back I know, they're still thinking about the things I've done. I can't explain my side to them because I swear, they won't understand.. never. :( and that's making me sad lately. I wish I have a time machine, I wish that's real. I want to turn back time. I wanted to skip those parts that I regret. I don't blame anyone, just myself. Well.. for now I think, the best thing to do is start a new life (without other people knowing it, it wouldn't make a difference for them anyway). So, I'll just live my life to the fullest, try not to remember those not-so good memories and just do good in life!! May God help me.. I hope it'll work. Till then..